Cat Hates Medicine

Isis sleeping!

 

 

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Funny Instructions for Giving your Cat a Pill

Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat’s mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth
with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of 10.

Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, holding front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold cats head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat’s throat vigorously.

Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtain.  Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with its head just visible from below spouse’s armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force cat’s mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply band-aid to spouse’s forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

Retrieve cat from neighbor’s shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.

Fetch screwdriver from garage and put door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Throw T-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

Ring fire brigade to retrieve cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.

Tie cat’s front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table. Find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Force cat’s mouth open with small spanner. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Hold head vertically and pour 1/2 pint of
water down throat to wash pill down.

Get spouse to drive you to emergency room; sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Stop by furniture shop on way home to order new table. Carefully sweep shattered figurines from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

 

1st photo is my own, 2nd photo is from Bing and the article is from Pet Place.

In reply to:  Comedy Plus – Happy Tuesday

10 – the most interesting Number….?

It is the very non-original number, repeating 0 and 1.

At the conclusion of Pre-K, small children should know how how to count up to it.

Children get so excited when they reach that age, “Wow, I’m now in double digits!”

Ironically, it is not long at all before we wish aging was done.

 

100’s are often counted by tens, how very useful it is indeed!

10 has a prefix, deca, to measure time, especially years, decades.

I think 10 is very special! Anniversaries are counted – I did succeed.

Performances are often measured on a ten point scale or grade.

 

Now, you may agree that 10 is an important number.

If you don’t, it is fine. It isn’t a great big bummer.

To tell you the truth,  I love best the number nine.

That is for another day, another poem, another time!

 

10

 

 

 

 

Ho – Hum…… In the Mind of a 16 week -old Pupp

 

Taken from my dog Mom and my sisters & brothers,

I come to a new place with 2 doggies and a cat, rather uppity,

The younger doggie, a tiny thing, is snappy and can’t be bothered,

I learn from her and get told, “No!” Human parents are so jumpity!

The older dog gently growls, but she’s warm and sort of like a mother.

 

Every time I turn around, there is some sort of new rule,

Just where do I use the restroom? One goes on a pad,

One goes outside and one uses a darned litter box. Egad!

My teeth always hurt, so I must chew and chew!

 

Which toy can I chew? They all taste so very yummy nummy!

What is a puppy to do? The human parents say, “No!” But I’m no dummy!”

Maybe the doggie will protect me, “Please, will you?”

The tiny dog just snickers. “It was not me, Yahoo!”

At the end of the day, I curl up with Granny & Mommy too. All comfy and warm.

All and all, my life is pretty dandy and cool. Way above the norm!

Freyja & me

In Other Words, ho-hum…

 

 

 

A Story of Hope & Looking Up

I watch the CBS Evening News each Friday to watch the final segment, Steve Hartman’s “Stories from the Road” to hear good news for a change of pace. For 31-year-old Jermaine Wilson of Leavenworth, Kansas, he hit rock bottom by going to prison for dealing drugs. However, he used the time well; he now speaks at his old elementary school to help children believe in a brighter tomorrow. He also has two day jobs, he helps people who just come out of prison obtain good jobs. Wilson also has become the Mayor of Leavenworth recently. He credits his time of incarceration for helping him get closer to God and getting his life on a much more positive track  through volunteering and  community activism. I just want to point out that you can still rise, even if you had the worst start in life. If you are down in the pit, you may as well look up. It beats looking down! If you want to see and hear the whole story, here is the link:

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/kansas-mayor-jermaine-wilson-was-once-in-prisons-maximum-security-wing/

Remember, your story can always be added to and reframed for the better by looking up and having supports around you! This creates HOPE!Hope endures